I.T. to Teacher

Throughout our halls there are student-made posters against drugs, drinking, and smoking. Some are amusing; most are just what you would expect. However, I saw a line on one that I have to pass on.

One anti-smoking poster lists the side effects of smoking. The usual suspects are there, but the last one caught my eye.

Desire to commit suicide
(90% of all people who commit suicide are smokers)

At first glance someone might think, "Wow, that's a powerful statistic." Hogwash. That's like saying:

90% of all people with glasses wash their hands at least 3 times a day, therefore poor eyesight is caused by excessive hand washing.

(My favorite is from the tenets of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster)

Global warming, earthquakes, hurricanes, and other natural disasters are a direct effect of the shrinking numbers of pirates since the 1800s.

I don't know who is making these posters, and I agree with their basic premise, but someone needs to teach their students that correlation does not imply causation.

I was watching Weird Al's "White and Nerdy" video tonight when I noticed something strange (I know, something strange in a Weird Al video, who'd have thunk). At several points in the video Al is dancing in front of a white background with this equation on it:


It's Schodinger's time-independant wave equation for the Hydrogen atom. I first thought, "That's cool. I remember doing stuff like that in college." Then I thought, "Hey, isn't that h supposed to be an h-bar?" So I looked it up and, sure enough, it's supposed to look like this:


Apparently I qualify as white and nerdy. Hmm... do I tell my students?

If you're interested, the wikipedia entry about the song is fun. That's where I got the equation images.

Here's what a typical day is like for me as a first year teacher.

5:30am - Alarm goes off. I struggle to my feet. The dog looks at me like I'm crazy, then curls up under the covers and goes back to sleep. Some days I wish I was a dog.

6:15-6:30am - Make the dog get out of bed to go outside. Let dog in; dog goes back to bed; I go to school.

(5-10 minutes later) Arrive at school.

6:30-7:00am - Sign in, check mail, go to my room, unpack my backpack, check email, make copies before the line starts.

7:00-7:50am - Get things set up for the day. Organize my notes, write today's agenda and homework on the board, answer questions from students who come early for help. Get miscellaneous stuff done if time permits.

7:50am - School starts. Every other day I have this period off. On those days I get to write detentions for being late to school for the first 15 minutes, then I get work done for the next 75 minutes. Sometimes students come by during their study hall with questions.

11:00-11:40am - Lunch. Two periods down, two to go.

11:40-1:20pm - My last period of the day.

1:20-3:00pm - I have this period off each day. Usually, when there aren't students doing make-ups or asking questions, I try to get work done, but end up trying to stay awake.

3:00pm - School ends. I have to be here until 3:30, though.

3:00-? - Most days I have students coming by with questions during this time. Two days a week I guarantee I'll be available until 4pm. Not like I leave before 4 anyway. I typically leave between 4:15 and 5 so I can go wake up the dog.

Afternoons - Once a week I play Ultimate Frisbee with students until 6. Once a week I tutor from 5-6. Otherwise I snack, and read a little while trying to stay awake.

Evenings - Grading and planning. I can be seen sitting at the dining table surrounded by papers and books until late into the night. The dog alternates between sleeping on her blanket on the floor next to me, or barking loudly at the night. Well, that and pawing my leg while looking at me with the epitome of puppy-dog-eyes saying, "It's time to go to bed. Really. Now."

Bedtime is usually between Midnight and 1am. If I'm in bed before Midnight it seems like an early night. I've had nights when I'm done early (such as tonight) and can go to bed around 11. Those are the nights I have trouble falling asleep.

You'll notice there's no running in this schedule. Nope, I only run once a week. I've been running 20+ miles every Saturday. This Saturday I have 25-26 or so planned. I only have until December to get ready for my Ultra.

I've been encouraged to join a teachers union (everyone seems to have their own idea about which one to join) because it's a "good thing." Blah blah blah, bargaining power, blah blah blah, gains for teachers, blah blah blah, legal protection. Ok, that last one catches me. I want to have some sort of legal protection in case some student decides to make up a story to ruin my life. I know someone this has happened to, and it is an understatement to say it has caused him great difficulties. The question becomes, what non-union options are there for comparison?

I've found AAE Teachers, which is a non-union, non-political, non-profit group for teachers which offers (among other things) legal protection. Anyone know of any others like this?

Once, I found a company that offered legal insurance for teachers just like car insurance, but I can't find it anymore.

It appears there are options, so the question is now, union or non-union?

I have to say, this really isn't a question for me. I think unions are an anachronism which serve no modern purpose other than causing problems for, and inhibiting, American business. They were great in their time, but that time has long passed. So, I can't join a union. On one of the new teacher training days there was a time where we could go talk to all of the professional organization booths. I almost went and tried to stir up the union folk, but it had been a long day and I just wanted to go home, so I didn't. I was going to talk to them about how my dues would be used for political purposes, and what say I had in those choices. I know the answers already (Democrat, and none), but I thought it would be fun to push some buttons. Can you imagine the look on their face if I had walked up and said, "I think teachers with concealed weapons permits should be allowed to carry in the classroom. Will your union work towards that goal?" I'm imagining some bug-eyed sputtering.

Anyway, I could rant on that for a while, but that's not the point of this post. I can't join a union, and I want legal protection. What do you suggest?

During a test the students had to measure something in centimeters.  I passed out rulers, but during the test a student raised her had and said, "Mr. …, this ruler doesn't have centimeters."  I get her another ruler and take the other one back.  I look at it and see english on top, metric on bottom, just like all the others.  I point at the metric side and say, "It has centimeters."  She said, "No, it only has millim…, oh."

AP students were talking about a TV show. 

One of the smarter ones asks, "When is it on?"
Other: "It's on Nick-at-Nite."
Smarty: "What channel is that?"
Other: "It's NICK-at-Nite.  It's on NICK-elodean."

An announcement comes over the loudspeaker announcement system.  As the announcer is doing the Wal-Mart Hang-up (you know, where they clatter the phone into the cradle while it's still live on the loudspeaker) you hear a voice that must have been right next to him say, "What was that you just announced?"

7 weeks in and things are going well.

I only had a few students fail my classes.  Most made A's or B's.  However, my AP classes have too many A's, I'm afraid.  I've been thinking perhaps things are too easy in those classes.  I try to give harder tests, but they still do well on them.  I've been trying to figure out what else I can do to make the class more challenging.  I'm not looking for a certain grade distribution, but if almost everyone is getting an A then the class needs to be harder.

This week I think I found the point where the classes are getting harder.  My APB class got more B's than A's on the last test, and they have another test tomorrow.  Hopefully that will be similar.  My APC class has been devouring everything I give them, no matter how hard I think I've made it.  They'll complain about how hard the test was, and then 90% of them will get A's.  This week I started throwing calculus at them in earnest, and they've started complaining that they want to go back to the last unit because it was much easier.  I'm hoping that the high grades until now were indicative of the material, not the difficulty of the class.

In more interesting news, I've started playing Ultimate Frisbee with a group of students.  I was talking frisbee with some of my students one day and they invited me to play with them.  I went last week and had a lot of fun.  They were mostly students from my AP classes, and cross country runners (the two groups overlapped considerably).  I was a bit worried that they'd run me into the ground since they're 10+ years my junior and currently training for speed.  Nope.  I held my own quite well.  They say they've played tournaments before, but I don't think they've ever tried to play in an organized fashion.  My experience with Ultimate allowed me to see things happening before the students did.  Ok, so I did hurt my leg and wasn't able to run that weekend, but it's not because I'm old!  I'm not old!